Oh my poor neglected blog :( I hate that I can't post pictures still. Without pictures I tend to ignore my blog. So here are some random thoughts and happenings in the Hinderks household.
Its the very end of April now and summer is just around the corner. It has been a crazy spring for us. We have had all of the normal things in our life like preschool for Carter, swim lessons for Carter, life groups, church, family time, yard work, and just normal everyday stuff. We just celebrated Easter last weekend and had a nice day. Of course I have pictures but can't post them. We did the Easter egg hunt at church on Saturday and then church on Sunday. The kids had matching outfits and looked super cute. We had dinner at my mom's later in the evening after Jay got off work. Easter is always fun for the kids but it is always such a hard balance teaching the truth of Easter and what Jesus did and the fun of egg hunt's and Easter egg baskets. We talked to the kids a ton this year about the truth of Easter and why everything changed on that special day. What a great truth to know...that Jesus Christ died on the cross for us and on the third day rose again to be in Heaven. I want my kids to fully grasp the reality of that and what it means for them today.
Carter turned four and Madelynn turned two in the last few months so we had two months back to back of parties. They really are growing up so fast. I love who they are and am so thankful for them. They are super funny. I wish I would write down all of the funny things they say. This one cracked me up...last night on our way to our growth group Carter said "if Owen sees my van when he gets here, he is going to say "look, there is Carter's van." When I told Owen's parents what Carter said they told me that is exactly what Owen said when he saw our van. Owen is Carter's best buddy and they truly are sweet together. They are wild and crazy and way too similar but they are so fun and sweet. It is fun watching my son have his first true best friend and I am thankful he found such a good friend in Owen. Carter is also very into coming up with numbers right now. His new favorite number is 100 sixty seventy. He thinks this is just the biggest number ever. He will tell his daddy that he is 100 sixty seventy tall and that he is taller than daddy. Funny kid. Madelynn loves to repeat everything and is starting to put two words together to form statements. She cracks me up because when I go to change her diaper she will tell me "me no poopy." When I respond to her she will then go through the entire family saying "mama, no poopy, Carter, no poopy, daddy, no poopy." You're right Madelynn...we do not have poopy diapers :) Thank you for telling me that . Our kids make us smile daily.
Both kids had their check-ups this last week. Carter had his four year check-up and weighed 39 pounds and was 40 1/2 inches tall. That put him in the 60th percentile for weight and 30th for height. He has come down a bit in his weight percentile but his height percentile was a little lower than I expected. I guess my short genes are bringing down Jay's tall genes in our kids. Sorry babe! Carter had his hearing and vision checked for the first time and was perfect on both. He also had his blood pressure checked for the first time and had great numbers. He is so grown up now. Doing those kinds of things at the doctor's office is new to us. He passed all of Dr. Wilson's questions like can he jump with both feet, hop on one foot, draw a circle and square, sleeps in his own bed, sleeps through the night, etc. So I guess he is right where he should be cognitively. Madelynn had her two year check-up and weighed 22 pounds and was 32 inches tall. That put her in the 10th percentile for weight and 30th for height. She is still a little peanut. And for the first time ever she passed all of Dr. Wilson's questions...does she have at least 25 words in her vocabulary, can she run, yata, yata. She was typically a little behind on some things but was all caught up at this appointment. She is still fairly quiet for a two year old but I know how much she understands and she is communicating so much more lately. I think our kids are just perfect. But what mom doesn't think that, right?
We have had some fairly major events take place over spring this year. The first is that on March 27th, we found out we were pregnant! I am nine weeks pregnant today and due December 3rd. We are very excited about this news and feel ready to bring another sweet baby into this family. We had some drama in the first three weeks of this pregnancy. I started bleeding just a few days after we found out so I called my doctor. I am in transition to a new OB because the one I had for Carter and Madelynn retired. So when I called the one I want to go to she said that I had to call my primary care physician because I am not actually her patient until my first appointment on May 21st at 12 weeks. So I called my primary and made an appointment the next day to see what was going on. We did lab work and then had to wait 48 hours to do the second lab draw to see if I was miscarrying or not. My numbers went from 411 to 11,000. We were so excited because it seemed that I was not miscarrying. That number is supposed to double in early pregnancy and mine more than tripled. It was very excited news because I was expecting that I was miscarrying. However, just a few days later I started bleeding again. So we made a second appointment for another lab draw and also did an ultrasound at the hospital. That ultrasound was at about five weeks, six days. The doctor called me with the results from the ultrasound and she was fairly certain something was wrong. She said she saw something on my left ovary, did not see a baby, and also saw a uterus bleed. None of that was good information however it was a little early to do an ultrasound and they just couldn't be sure of anything. We also did another lab draw that showed my levels still rising significantly. We were all very confused. At that point we had to just wait another week to do another ultrasound which should be far enough out that we would be able to see a baby if there was one. We also did one more lab draw during that week and it showed my levels continuing to rise but they weren't doubling. My doctor was concerned about that. She said they should be doubling. I even had a phone call from my doctor during that week who had just looked over all of my reports (the PA had been working with me before) and said she was fairly certain I was having an ectopic pregnancy. This was devastating news to me. All I could think about was having to walk into a hospital choosing to end my baby's life. I knew there was no other option because if the baby was growing in my tubes both the baby and I would probably die. It was still horrifying to think about though. My doctor actually called an OB to get a second opinion and called me back saying that the OB did not think it was an ectopic pregnancy. It was an emotional roller coaster! So one week later we went back to the hospital for the second ultrasound. That entire day (my appointment wasn't until 4) I was feeling a ton of different emotions. I subbed all day and during my lunch break I just stood in the gym at the school praying out loud for like ten minutes. I felt peace. I actually had hope that I was not losing this baby. There were too many things that looked like I was carrying this baby perfectly and only a couple little odd things that pointed to miscarriage. I really had hope. This hope scared me though because I knew it would have hurt even more going into that ultrasound feeling great about things only to find out we were losing the baby. I had so many friends and family praying for our baby and I really felt those prayers. We went feeling like it was a huge day but feeling peaceful about the outcome. The tech started the ultrasound and I quickly told her that I knew she wasn't supposed to tell us anything but I absolutely could not leave there not knowing anything. I asked her to tell us everything we were seeing on the screen. So she moves around a little and says "do you see that white space. I said yes. She said that is the sac. Then she said do you see this dark spot with the fluttering right in the middle. I said yes. She said that is your baby and your baby's heartbeat. Our baby was in the exact right spot and had the most perfect beautiful fluttering of a heartbeat. Of course I cried. The ultrasound tech said that it was harder to record the heartbeat if I was crying and that she was going to cry if I did :) So I held it together for her to measure the heartbeat. She told me that they train them to keep their emotions hidden when the ultrasound is showing devastating news to that mom but they aren't trained in how to keep it in when it is exciting and happy news. It was a really great moment! All the way home we called and texted everyone that had been praying for us to tell them we still had a baby! That evening the PA from my primary care's office called. She made me mad because she basically said "well, that is good news but I'm still really concerned that your levels aren't doubling. I think you need to get into your OB right away." So the next morning I called my OB and explained everything again. She called and got all of my results from the lab draws and ultrasound and called me the next morning. She said that everything looked perfect to her and that nothing was ever wrong. The first ultrasound was just too early. My left ovary had nothing on it but was just swollen from where the egg had come from. Totally normal. The uterine bleed is very common and happens to many women and was what had caused me to bleed. My primary had never connected the bleed with why I was bleeding. Sorry if this is too personal! She also told me that levels should double until about six weeks and then they continue to rise but they slow down...which is exactly what my levels did. Ugh. Nothing was ever wrong and we went through three weeks of sadness and fear and racking up medical bills for nothing. But, we were pregnant and so unbelievable grateful that our baby was healthy! And now weeks later, I am nine weeks pregnant, nauseous 24 hours a day, seven days a week and am starting to feel comfortable with this pregnancy that we are going to meet this baby at the end of November. That was one of the hardest times of my life. I have miscarried before but it was quick and simple. Still devastating but quick. I grieved for a few days and moved on. This one was just dragging on with so many different things happening and no one knowing what was really wrong. Very difficult. But we are so thankful for this life. And we can't wait to meet him or her in November.
The other big event that has just happened is the END of my master's program. I finished my thesis this month and presented it last Tuesday. There was a chance of one more revision this week but I just got an e-mail last night letting me know that it is done and has been evaluated and scored. I scored well and am very pleased with the end result and final evaluation. The presentation went well. I was in a room with three other students who also presented and then three professor's and my husband. I felt good about my presentation and feel amazing relief that it is over. That was four years of waiting to get through that project. I was anticipating and feeling anxious about the entire thesis process and the presentation the entire four years of my program. And now it is finished! I graduate in two days and I am so excited! Saturday will be a great day! I can't even imagine what it will feel like to know that I never have to do homework again! It isn't real to me yet.
This month is filled with excited events! Graduation in two days, Mother's Day, my 31st birthday, our first official doctor's appointment to hear our baby's heartbeat, and then our two week trip to Iowa. We are very excited to go to Iowa and see the family. Well, hopefully I will be back soon with pictures!
